derail your own train

in Amsterdam where it is raining. I picked up a very cute old Gujarati grandmother who is now accompanying me. I tried to help her onto a moving walkway and she almost took us both down. twelve hours to Mumbai. many more to Hyderabad. sigh.

baby went to amsterdam
she put a little money into travelling
now it’s so slow, so slow

and also

DON’T THESE BITCHES EVER WEAR SWEATPANTS????????

“it’s a television, not the end of the world”

i am watching sex and the city 2. the problem is i can’t remember anything from sex and the city 1 because i was too drunk. did carrie and big actually get married? why does liza minnelli seem like she’s going to wheeze to death on the stage? why are liza’s legs still so skinny at like age 60? is this entire movie anorexic? why is carrie’s hair so frizzy? how come it seems like something bad is going to happen? why is miranda’s life always so miserable? she looks like a walking skeleton.  how come carrie is mad that big brought home expensive japanese takeout food? and carrie has mad horseface and is ridiculously naggy. whine wine whine wine. how come big has a real job and is actually tired and getting dragged around. how come carrie is wearing white heels? why is samantha’s bag 6 feet wide? why is charlotte baking so many cupcakes?  how did they get a free trip to abu dhabi? they keep talking about the economy but it doesn’t seem to affect much in their lives and the movie worships decadence and name brands. why is carrie wearing a newspaper print dress? also, the dialogue is ridiculously cheesy. this is painful to watch.

clientsfromhell:

Me: Here are the photographs from the shoot yesterday

Client: Nice shots - I like this one from behind the man. Can you just flip the image so we can see his face and not the back of his head?

Me: You want me to turn him around in the photograph so you can see his face?

Client: Yes - and maybe we can make him black. Do you have Photoshop?